Okay, here comes the vent:
When do I get to have "me time" without feeling guilty?
I actually thought I was going to make it tonight back to the Dailey Method class that I started over a month ago taught by my beautiful sister in law. Sadly, once 3:00 hits, I do. not. stop. until after 9:30pm: kids activities, chores, going over homework with 3 kids, giving pre-spelling tests, math quizzes and listening to them read for 25 min, dinner, clean up, laundry changed, and preparation for the following morning all start swirling into this sometimes exhausting whirlwind of chaos that if I am not mentally and physically present for, it just won't get done. I realize that I have the same amount of hours in a day that everyone else does, I have less kids than some of my friends, and I don't have any other special circumstances that would make it any more of a challenge than anyone else to just get it all done and still make "me time" a priority. So what gives? Doesn't God know that I am consumed by thoughts and feelings of unhappiness with myself? Why do evenings have to always be poured out to everyone else? If I have to choose then I know I am making the right decision by being home with and for my family. It's what I am called to do, and evenings, at least for now, are not all about me. I am working towards being that super-human ultimately prepared woman who has it all done before 6 o'clock so that I can sneak out of the house for a couple hours and be nice to my body. I wish I was already that woman.
